How to win at Monopoly

Ever fancied yourself as a property tycoon?

Ever wanted to be the landlord of some of the most prestigious properties in London?

Well stop thinking about it, roll your sleeves up and just do it! Round up Four other wannabe property tycoons and challenge them to a game of Monopoly.

Follow my simple steps and you’ll be collecting rent from all directions and your pockets will be bursting with cash!

Step 1. Volunteer to be the Banker. Being in the position of the Banker gets you the necessary experience with dealing with lots of Dosh. Once you have the experience it won’t be a shock to your system when the rent starts abundantly flowing in your direction. Another benefit of being the Banker is that you can sneakily help yourself to a few £500 notes if things get a bit tight … every little helps!

Step 2. Portfolio is key. Now many will look to snap up those dark Blue properties (Park Lane and Mayfair) or the Green ones (Bond Street). There’s nothing wrong with that train of thought but now it’s time to think outside the box. Ever considered Old Kent Road & Whitechapel? What about the Blue’s of Angel Islington, Euston Road and Pentonville Road? Think about it … if another property tycoon is going through a tough financial time and has just collected £200 for passing Go, you can swipe that £200 (and a tad more) straight out of their hand if you have 3 houses on The Angel of Islington. A good mixture of cheap, mid-priced and expensive properties make up a portfolio that will send your competitors into bankruptcy.

Step 3. Jail can be beneficial. ‘I’ve done nothing!’ you argue but you’ve got to go. You may be possession of a ‘Get out of Jail free card’ but think twice about using it (you can sell it to the highest bidder to top up your cash). A little spell in Jail can give you valuable thinking time whilst you take a bit of a break from wheeling and dealing. Once you’re out, you’ll be shrewder and make your competitors weep whilst they are whittled down to £1 notes.

Step 4. Don’t ignore the Stations! These stand bang in the centre on each side of the board. They are not yet privatized and are still owned by British Rail Again these can be a nice little earner … £50 rent if you have a couple of these stations … not bad eh?

Step 5. Don’t dismiss the Utilities! Just like the stations the utilities can be a nice little earner. Snap up the Electric Company and Water Works for a bargain of £300 and hope that your competitors’ lands on them with high amounts on the dice … they’ll need to fork out 10 times the amount shown on the dice. Again can be a nice little sneaky earner.

Step 6. Take the rough with the smooth. Face the fact that you will get stung at some point when it’s your turn to scoop up Chance or Community Chest. You may have to fork out for offences such as Speeding and Drunk in Charge or maybe your houses are in need of general repairs. The other side of the coin is that you can get tax returns, do well in a beauty contest or even collect a few quid due to a Bank error. It really just comes down to pure luck and you have no say in the matter.

Step 7. Keep on building. Gobble up as many houses as you can and progress to a hotel. A big Red hotel is intimidating for your competitors … watch them sweat like a Pig in a Sauna as they approach your stretch of properties. Red equals danger … and landing on a property with a hotel could mean ending the career of a wannabe property tycoon.

Step 8. Keep your eyes peeled! Sadly there’s a lot of dodgy dealings between property tycoons. In Monopoly there are no regulatory bodies such as the FSA to keep property tycoons in check. Watch your competitors like a Hawk! The only one allowed to cheat in this game is you … the Banker!

Step 9. Be ruthless. Once a wannabe property tycoon has run out of dosh and property to sell, boot em out the game! Offer no IOU’s or cash. Get rid of them!

Step 10. Patience is the key. The games of Monopoly can last for hours so don’t be hasty in your decision making. Set yourself up mentally for a marathon not a sprint. Stick to these simple 10 steps and you’ll be a very wealthy property tycoon and the other wannabe’s will be in awe of your shrewdness.