LAST week it was advice for the boys. This week the girls take centre stage. A term at Grange Hill may seem pretty daunting, but it will be a stroll in the park when you follow the sound advice from the retrohen team. Let’s go …

  1. Hang out with Trish Yates. Let’s face it … you’ll hardly catch Trish with a smile on her face. Chances are that you’ll hear her attempting to rebuke Tucker. Trish will stand up for herself and she’ll stand up for you once you’re on her side. Troops and allies are what you need to survive the term … with her rapid fire verbal defence, you’ll have an ally in Trish Yates.

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2. Avoid Imelda Davis. I say avoid but it really depends on the career path you want to take. If survival to you means getting good O Level grades, being the teachers pet whilst being a goodie goodie, then avoid Imelda. If you plan to leave Grange Hill with a reputation of dishing out Slaps, Punches and Kicks and pursue a career in the underworld, then Imelda is your girl. Remember … if you make your bed, you must lie in it!

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3. Watch out for McClusky. She may come across as the soft Headteacher but tread with caution. If you get dragged to her office and think you’ll be able to explain the reasons for your wrongdoings, think again! Mrs McClusky will give you that look … ‘Really? … Yeah right … I don’t believe you … You’re a liar!’ If you don’t want to spend the majority of the term in detention, then best avoid being marched to McClusky’s office.

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4. Explore your caring side … like Janet. Janet has a caring heart. Janet is persistent … she’s always trying to help outcast Roland. ‘Ro Land … Ro Land … Ro Land …’. Even though Roland has told her to get lost and leave him alone on many occasions, Janet just won’t give up. Find an outcast, be nice to them, stand by them through their dark days and surely they will show their appreciaton somewhere in the far off distant future.

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5. Spend time with the good lookers. This is a sure way to get yourself noticed … and to get yourself a boyfriend! Be seen with the good lookers of Grange Hill and you won’t want the term to end. Fay, Cally and Annette are a few suggestions.

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Sound advice for the girls from the retrohen team. Your term at Grange Hill will be assured, fun and memorable … and of course you’ll survive.

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